Irene's Secret Tips, Products, and Interviews Geared Towards Showing Adolescent Girls How to Thrive and Excel in Our Cultural Times!

Is There A Way to Stop the Cycle?

Posted on: June 8, 2010

                             
               I think that there are many things that mothers
               and daughters can do to get along better with one
               another. There are no sure fire ways to completely
               stop this cycle. However, there are a few things
               that both mothers and daughters could do to help
               with this situation.
              
               Here are a few tips on how to stop this cycle.
              
               1.  Open lines of communication as early as
               possible. It is best if mothers take the upper hand
               in this role. But if you are noticing that your mother
               is becoming increasingly closed in her communication
               with you, try to open lines of communication
               by spending time just hanging out with her and by
               telling her how you feel about things that are of
               importance to you.
              
               2.  Always be respectful of each other. Not only
               should daughters be respectful of their mothers, but
               mothers should also be respectful of their daughters.
               This means that they should maintain certain
               boundaries and not be mean and disrespectful.
              
               3.  Others should never shout at their daughters
               and vice versa. Instead, retreat to a quiet place
               and talk openly with each other. Try to instill
               these habits as often as possible.
              
               Mothers: listen to your daughter’s pleas without
               interrupting them. Make sure that you HEAR what
               your daughter is saying.
              
               Daughters: listen to what your mother is saying
               without interrupting her. Make sure that you
               understand where she is coming from.
              
               4.  Negotiate things right from the beginning.
               Don’t say “NO” to your daughter all the time. If
               something really bothers you, sit down calmly and
               tell your daughter what is bothering you. Try to
               come to an understanding instead of arguing.
              
               Daughters should never expect to get everything
               that they want. They can, however, expect to get
               some things. And that means that mothers have to be
               able to negotiate. But daughters should be able to
               negotiate as well. This is what fairness is all
               about.
                                             ~ Irene

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Irene Roth

Irene S. Roth, Freelance Writer for Teens, Tweens, and Kids

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